Mourning for what is not worthy of grief.
Bhagavad Gita 2.11
Grief and lamentation. Paṇḍitāḥ
aśocyān anvaśocas tvaṁ
prajñā-vādāmś ca bhāṣase
gatāsūn agatāsūmś ca nānuśocanti paṇḍitāḥ
The Supreme Personality of Godhead said: While speaking learned words, you are mourning for what is not worthy of grief. Those who are wise lament neither for the living nor for the dead.
Yes there is no point in crying over spilt milk. But lamenting is the natural expression of feeling for we the human beings,whenever we loose something which is precious and dear to us. It is very difficult to maintain poise at all situations. Sri.Rama who took the avadhara of a human did not show any remorse in the situation of asking Him to go to forest for 14 years but by his own father under the instructions of his wife kaijeyi.
Rama expressed His adhimanusha character in that situation by maintaining equanimity in bot situation that is He was chosen as the successor king previous day but next day morning He was asked to leave everything go in exile. But Dhasaradha who acted as a normal human being could not control the grief of separation his most loved elder son for 14 years and laments like anything.
This is exactly portrayed by Sri.Kulashekara Alwar in his Perumal Thirumozhi, 9 th Thirumozhi, in which he laments to the hilt,even cursing himself and his beloved wife Kaikeyi too and finally even succumbed to death because he could not bear the loss of Sri.Rama even though it was a temporary separation for 14 years.
Similarly in Krishnavadhara , just to escape from the clutches of Kansa,Vasudeva takes the new born child in the night itself and shifts Him to Nandhagopan’s house at Gokulam from Mathura. Krishna spends 14 years at Gokulam and Brindavan and all His childhood past times were experienced and enjoyed by yasodha and Nandhagopan.So after 14 years,Krishna slayed Kamsa and released His parents from jail.
At that time Devaki even after Krishna grew up still milk started oozing from her breasts and Krishna obliged her to satiate her affection. Then Devaki expressed that she has missed Krishna’s childhood past times and felt very much that she is not as fortunate like Yasodha and Vasudevan as Nandha gopan. This scene also portrayed by Kulasekaran alwar in 7 th Thirumozhi as the lamenting of Devaki. But Krishna as a special case reconstructed the whole past times and shown to Devaki and Vasudevan which they immensely enjoyed.So it is but natural to express our grief by lamenting. But as Krishna said death is a permanent separation and inevitable but that is not in our control.
So a thing which is not in our control it is prudent not to lament on that whatever we do we cannot retrieve the loss. It is very difficult to practice such balance but it is wiser to develop that maturity for a better living.
Also see: https://vedabase.io/en/library/bg/2/11/
Srila Prabhupada’s purport:
The Lord at once took the position of the teacher and chastised the student, calling him, indirectly, a fool. The Lord said, “You are talking like a learned man, but you do not know that one who is learned – one who knows what is body and what is soul – does not lament for any stage of the body, neither in the living nor in the dead condition.” As explained in later chapters, it will be clear that knowledge means to know matter and spirit and the controller of both.
Arjuna argued that religious principles should be given more importance than politics or sociology, but he did not know that knowledge of matter, soul and the Supreme is even more important than religious formularies. And because he was lacking in that knowledge, he should not have posed himself as a very learned man. As he did not happen to be a very learned man, he was consequently lamenting for something which was unworthy of lamentation.
The body is born and is destined to be vanquished today or tomorrow; therefore the body is not as important as the soul. One who knows this is actually learned, and for him there is no cause for lamentation, regardless of the condition of the material body.
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